You did it.
You’ve actually stuck with me for a second year, my dearest darling readers! I’VE actually stuck with me for a second year. I’m notorious for coming up with grand ideas, starting projects but never seeing them through.
The fact that I’m still here means we need to celebrate!
Last year’s blogiversary post was a reflection on the passage of time and my initial observations about blogging. This year, the main thing I want to say is thank you.
I’ve hinted at my mental instability on this blog in the past, usually through humour, but I’ve never come right out and admitted to struggling with depression and anxiety. It’s debilitating at times. It makes me an unbearable person to live with. Hell, most of the time I can’t bear being me.
Have you seen Julie and Julia? In one part of the movie, Julie states that Julia Child and food saved her. It struck such a deep chord with me because…
This blog saved me.
Baking saved me.
The Husband with his unwavering support and necessary doses of reality saved me.
You, my dear reader, saved me.
You continue to save me, every day.
I can’t begin to tell you how much it means to me that you read my words and that you comment with such thought, eloquence, care, humour and friendship. There were (and continue to be) so many occasions where I’m melting down, sinking, flailing, failing.
Where the darkness that lurks in my mind seems insurmountable.
Where I feel like the world’s biggest fuck up.
Where all I can feel is pain, anger, sadness and wild, destructive panic.
Where I can’t pull myself out, where sometimes I don’t want to pull myself out.
Baking fills my world with light. Talking to you brings me immeasurable joy. I may not have a million readers, a book deal or mad money being generated by this blog but it’s given me so much more than those material things.
Posts from the past two years that I’m proud of:
Sour Cream Orange Cake For My Body Issues – I’m just saying what every woman is thinking. We hate our bodies and it sucks. We all think if we were skinnier/curvier, etc, we’d be beautiful and therefore happier but it’s not true. Western society has dictated what is beautiful and we’ve all been brainwashed into believing it. We need to be kinder to ourselves. Thank you so much for your incredible comments. Sisters unite!
Related to that is the post I wrote about Julie Chen and her eyelid surgery: On Asian Eyes and S’mores Cookie Bars. SUCH a fun topic and again, amazing commentary from you guys.
Pumpkin Cheesecake Bars and What Am I Going To Do With My Life – I’m a very angsty person. I agonize over everything. I’m always overanalyzing my life and thinking that things could be better. That something external to myself will make me happier. You guys left me the best comments and y’all lifted my spirits with your stories and commiseration. Seriously, the response blew me away.
The Baked Brownie: Guest Post by @wallflourgirl – I didn’t write this post but I’m so proud to be friends with Ala, the brilliant mind behind Wallflour Girl. You guys really connected with her message of positivity and appreciating the small, joyful moments of life. Ala really is as energetic and positive as she seems on her blog. Meeting her and reading her posts has inspired me to become more positive, as I outlined in my Funfetti Rice Krispies Squares post.
Caramilk Stuffed No-Knead Brioche for a #MothersDayParty – I’m a very open person and I like sharing bits ‘n pieces of my life with you, including the way I was raised by my strong, stoic mother. I loved every comment left for me on this post.
My Random Crap posts (see here and here). Goddamn, do I have fun writing these. And you guys crack me up with your hilarious comments.
I hope you see the common theme here. What I truly love and appreciate is the back and forth conversations I have with you, my dearest readers. Your comments always make me laugh, make me think and I look forward to reading them every time I press “publish” on my posts. It’s why I blog. The community I belong to and the connections I’ve built have made every blogging moment priceless.
So let’s smash some cake up in here.
Why should babies have all the fun? Grown ass people want to smash cakes and smear it all over their faces too!
By the way, this cake was from a box mix and the icing is canned. After having made my own cakes for the past two years, I can definitely say homemade is a thousand times better (no offence, Betty ‘n Duncan! I enjoyed your products for many years but I’m afraid our separation will be permanent).
Thank you for having shared this experience with me so far. I couldn’t do it without you. Here’s to another year, dearest readers!
Credit for all these photos goes to the Husband.